Tonight’s Menu? Homo Sapiens a la car!

Today we wanted to type about the possible ways a zombie can kill you. We like to entertain fast zombies but in this post we’ll focus on slow ones. Let’s start with a reality check, one slow zombie is not a threat if taken down effectively, that would mean in a silent way. I’m sure that’s what melee weapons are for. So exactly how can a zombie kill you? There’s 2 ways:

1)      He either overpowers you with numbers

2)      He catches you distracted or asleep.

Let’s start with number 1:

I’m not going to say herd like in The Walking Dead cause it sounds so stupid but look at the size of this horde. If you aren’t in a fortified location and you decide to fight back odds are you will die. It seems that now a days slow zombies are extremely sensitive to noise and when they get close to their meal they gain momentum, coordination and a little bit of speed to give them that Hollywood upper edge. Anyone else notice that?  So, if you get surrounded you basically are fucked according to this rule. You also have the option of running away but here is the deal, you might know the route you came from but most likely if you head in another direction you don’t know what else you will encounter. It might be more dangerous than this group of zombies. A simple solution is every time you camp out you set a perimeter and/or  check your surroundings in a decent radius from the location you will be staying. You can patrol the area and scavenge for supplies, food, weapons or better yet a more effective and secure place to stay at. Remember this is all based on your location. I’m sure most of you know not to roam around in places where you can easily be cornered or put in a tight spot such as a city or similar areas.

Number 2:

A zombie catching you distracted? No fucking way, impossible. This might be true if you are always at the ready and are the king of situational awareness, most of the time this is impossible to do because there is another enemy that will make sure you lose this… SLEEP. All of us need sleep or be rested to be on our toes. When we don’t get enough sleep we are irritated, can’t concentrate, and usually make stupid mistakes that in a Zombie Apocalypse can lead you to death. Sleep can affect us in our group night watch. If you ever worked in a place were you had to take a night watch or wake up really early you might understand. In today’s world we might drown our sleep under 20 cans of energy drinks and 30 pots of coffee but unfortunately this ain’t going to happen in the zombie apocalypse. There are simple solutions that are common sense, whenever you feel tired take a nap in a secure place. Go up in the trees and hang a hammock, find a place where it will be hard for zombies to get you and take a power nap. Same thing applies for regular sleep. We can’t be on the offense if you are restless.

Don’t become a Dale where “Ninja Zombie” rips open your stomach. Don’t be Daryl and wake up to a zombie eating your steel toed boot (yes, yes he suffered a major fall). Don’t be an idiot by not posting a perimeter and zombies overrun your settlement and precious RV. Don’t prance around in your horse and then get in arms reach of a zombie horde.  In essence don’t be a fucking Hollywood actor, we should know better.