This is Hung Likeahorse, at the ZAA news studios, with an interesting story coming out of Russia. With more on this we hand you over to our Russia correspondent Seymour Butts.
Thank you Hung. Over the last few days there has been a great deal of activity around the small town of Izabigarze. Due to the large military presence people are speculating that this could be some sort of zombie out break. But now I can exclusively reveal whats REALLY been going on in Izabigarze. A few days ago a hand full of Izabigarze residents noticed that the majority of people in the town had become incoherent. Uncoordinated, and some even violent. Fearing for their lives this small uninfected group barricaded themselves into a local inn. One of the group a ZAA member and soldier on leave feared the worst. So he contacted his barracks (being careful not to mention the zed word) and told his commanding officers about the situation. Fearing some sort of terrorist attack the town was quickly sealed off and quarantined.
A group of soldiers along with scientists were dispatched into the town to find survivors. Ascertain what sort of threat the townsfolk were, and find the source of the problem. The soldiers preparing for all hell to possibly break lose, were surprised that on entering the town they found the locals to be of no threat. Some were just stumbling around while others were completely incoherent rolling around the floor. Puzzled by this, local military officials ordered that the town was to remain sealed. And all survivors were to be quarantined until the source of the problem had been ascertained. Scientists began taking air. Soil, and water samples. Plus some of the affected towns residents were taken away for tests. It didn’t take scientists long to discover that the Izabigarze locals were all in fact heavily intoxicated.
It appeared that the towns water supply had been contaminated. It should be noted that those unaffected only drank bottled water. Thinking that this could just be a test run by some crazed terrorist cell Izabigarze’s water supply was watched. The cause of the contamination was quickly found. It appears that a local vodka distillery had been pouring its excess vodka into the towns water supply for months. The owners of the distillery were summoned to Moscow. But the story has a happy ending. The survivors were freed. The townspeople sobered up. No one was arrested or charged. And the surplus vodka from now on will be sent directly to the Kremlin. No zombies this time Hung. Never mind. Theres always next time. For ZAA news this is Hung Likeahorse signing off.





